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The Difficulty of being Faithful

by loverzquarrel

Why is being faithful so difficult? For some of us being faithful is innate it is in our DNA the thought of straying doesn’t enter your mind like it does for someone like me. I don’t want to go against the grain but somehow temptation is harder to fight for those like me. Some cheat simply because they can or do it because they do not know how to conduct life without someone on the side. 

Being loyal just doesn’t come natural to some of us. We tried it and it just did not work out for whatever reason. I am not justifying our actions by any means just trying to get a better understanding of why we do what we do. I find faithfulness like patience as a virtue I have not fully grasped.  I know it is not right but I always have this fear in the back of my mind like he is cheating too. I just believe that since I struggle with being loyal that it must be difficult for him too. Now if I really narrowed it down I would say I cheat for three reasons lack of my man’s attention, emotional needs aren’t being met, and simply the fear of trusting my heart to any man. I know by admitting this it may mean that no man will trust me but I guess that is a risk I am willing to take.

Since we are being honest here is a little bit of truth for you I have been in a situation where my man gave me everything I wanted but I still longed to be somewhere else.  I always get caught up in these situations where the last man was emotionally unavailable so I went on to being with someone who was emotionally giving. Someone that was not afraid to show love for me.  Someone that was actually proud to have me on his arm.  Yet for some reason I sought out someone else to fill a void I needed a Plan B. I was not comfortable resting my laurels or eggs in one basket.

If I were truly honest I would admit I often settle for Plan A because Plan B did not work in my favor. My disloyal ways are both egregious and unfair. I know that word Karma is floating around in there somewhere.  But I am not afraid of what she has in store for me because I know I rightfully deserve it. My sis Jazz said if I get a good Plan A then I won’t need a Plan B. I cannot be faithful until I stop settling. I guess that means being single for a little bit longer to be able to truly introspect and define what I want and need.

Do you struggle with being faithful? Why is being faithful such a struggle? Share your thoughts below.



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